Trump and Tiger: The Scorecard Says It All

Donald and Eldrick Have More in Common Than You Thought and It Could Bring Them a World of Troubles

“Democracy is the Worst Form of Government, Except for All the Other Forms” – Churchill

“Democracy?  Just Witness Our Reporting” – Squibley and Bushwhacker

By Andrew Squibley and Arthur Bushwhacker, Investigative Correspondents

April 11, 2019

WASHINGTON (RUETERS) — Federal investigators in New York have “gathered more evidence than previously known” from individuals in the President’s inner circle related to hush-money payments made to multiple women who claim they had affairs with President Donald Trump and golfing buddy Tiger Woods, Rueters has learned.

trump whispers to tiger
Trump and Woods comparing “scores.”  (Rueters photo)

In recent months, prosecutors in the Manhattan US Attorney’s office interviewed Hope Hicks, the former White House communications director and longtime confidante of Trump, and Keith Schiller, the President’s longtime bodyguard, as well as Woods’s former caddies, Mike “Fluff” Cowan, 91, and Steve Williams, 55, sources in the prosecutor’s office told Rueters.

Investigators “learned of calls” between Schiller and David Pecker, the head of American Media Inc., the company that publishes the National Enquirer. Pecker worked with Michael Cohen, Trump’s and Woods’s former lawyer and “fixer,” to suppress potentially damaging claims made against candidate Trump and golf superstar Woods by “only-God-knows-how-many” women, with AMI using a tabloid tactic called “catch and kill,” Rueters was told.

Cowan, known in Woods’s early career as “the knee-capper,” was generally acknowledged as a physical threat to anyone writing or saying anything derogatory about the young champion golfer.

A notorious drinker and bar brawler, despite his advanced age, Cowan spent at least a dozen nights in local lockups along the PGA tour from 1996, when Woods turned pro, until 1999, when he was replaced by Williams, Rueters learned.  In most cases, Cowan was released after Woods posted his bail and paid the courts a fine, law enforcement sources told Rueters.

Tiger Woods’s first two caddies, Mike “Fluff” Cowan, l, and Steve Williams who appears to be pointing out someone in the crowd.  Anyone we know, Stevie?  (Photos by Rueters)

“If Cowan is talking to the feds,” said one former assistant US attorney, “that could mean real trouble for both Tiger and Trump.  Both of these two dogs ‘shared and compared’ female company for decades.  Even up to last year.

“Cowan saw it all.  He may have made some introductions along the way, as unlikely as his mustache makes that seem.  The amount of hush-money Trump and Tiger must have shelled out – combined – during that time could have built Trump Tower.”

scorecard1
Mar-a-Lago Golf Course signed scorecard from July Fourth, 2018, showing “shared and compared” scores by Woods and Trump who both ranked 19th Century legend Tempest Storm highest point winner among their one-night stands.

Though widely known as the leading beneficiary of AMI’s “protection,” the president and one-time TV reality star wasn’t alone in receiving the publication’s famous “soft-touch” treatment.

Prosecutors told Rueters the poor-excuse-for-a-publisher followed a similar pattern of squirreling away potential blackmail material when it came to burying unflattering, and consistently adulterous, stories about Woods.  Woods’s six-year marriage to Swedish model Elin Nordegren flamed out in 2010 after word of his numerous salacious affairs began hitting the press.

Speaking through an interpreter, New Zealander Williams, Woods’s second caddie, reportedly told investigators, “We tried keeping him in his hotel when he wasn’t on the (golf) course, but the girls – so many Sheilas – would sneak into his room every bloody night.

“He used to brag about doing the ‘back nine’ at the Sheraton on a nightly basis,” Williams said. 

Three of Trump’s and Woods’s “shared and compared” playmates, Stormy Daniels (top left), Laci Kay Somers (lower left), and the renowned and resplendent Tempest Storm, the last of the greatest 19th Century strippers.

In addition to having eye witnesses to both Trump’s and Woods’s bad behavior – vigorously but falsely denied by both men in recent years – sources said investigators also “possess a recorded phone conversation” between “fixer” Cohen and a lawyer who represented two of the women claiming affairs with Cohen’s famous clients.

Trump has denied having affairs with Stephanie Clifford, also known as Stormy Daniels, and one-time Playmate bunny Karen McDougal.  Woods has denied affairs with all of the women who claimed to have bedded him, with the notable exception of Ms. Storm.  “A lay for the ages,” he told a close friend.

As for Schiller, Rueters has learned the former Trump bodyguard is being investigated by federal prosecutors for his role as middleman in arranging conversations between the candidate and AMI’s Pecker regarding hush money payments to his many one-night stands.

Hicks similarly was questioned by investigators about her “contacts with Pecker,” said a source trying not to laugh like a middle-schooler.

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