DeSantis V Disney, Round Two: ‘Landslide Ron’ Inherits Billion-Dollar Bond Problem; Says Not to Worry, Florida, He’s Got an Idea

Twitter’s Next Owner Has Grand Plans to Streamline Popular Service, Including More Accurate Name

Newsmakerblog’s ‘Reputation in Pieces’ (RIP) Club Takes On Another Class; Any Guesses Who’s In, America?

May 1, 2022

By Andrew Squibley and Arthur Bushwhacker, Text Messages to Mark Meadows Never Answered

“Democracy Dies in Darkness…and with Marjorie Taylor Greene’s Support for ‘Marshall’ Law”

Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis shows his natural enthusiasm for state takeover of Magic Kingdom; already knows who he wants to be. (Rueters photos)

TALLAHASSEE, Fla. (Rueters) – Plans for a state takeover of the Magic Kingdom and other properties in Disney World “are well advanced,” a senior aide to Republican Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis told Rueters Sunday.

Stuck with an unexpected billion-dollar bill for dissolving Disney’s privately-run provider of government services — and responding to Disney’s threats to leave the Sunshine State — lawmakers over the weekend approved DeSantis’s proposal to use most if not all the state’s 100,000 employees to fill in part time to keep Florida’s largest tourist destination open and operating.

“Yes, the governor was pissed off with Disney’s opposition to our Don’t Say Gay Bill,” one lawmaker said on the condition of anonymity because he didn’t want to look stupid. “And yes, we agreed to dissolve the Reedy Creek development district because the governor was mad at the Mouse. But we’re not backing down. If we have to pay a billion bucks to Reedy’s bond holders, then we’re going to run the Magic Kingdom our way.”

Details regarding a state takeover of Disney World are a bit thin right now, senior aides to DeSantis said, but Rueters has learned the first-term governor and members of his cabinet will handle duties at the daily “character breakfast” during which the most popular Disney cartoon stars meet and greet park visitors.

Florida’s own “Governor Goofy” wants to be re-elected to a second term this fall. He tells voters he’s fighting for them — to keep them unmasked, to keep them from feeling badly about slavery and racism and to keep discussion of LGBTQ rights away from kids. Florida political pundits wonder if “Landslide Ron” will convince enough independents to Go Goofy. Or maybe they’ve just had enough goofiness. Gawrsh! (Rueters photo)

“Ron really wants to be Goofy,” a longtime friend said about the governor. “I think most of the state’s electorate can really see him in the role. I mean, he’s had more than three years of pushing the envelope for the dumbest of reasons.”

DeSantis, who won election in 2018 with a victory margin of 0.4 percent, has taken hard lines on everything from being against Covid mask mandates and other public health measures, to banning the teaching of so-called “critical race theory” in Florida schools, to his latest social hot button, banning discussion of homosexuality and transgenderism with younger public school students.

Disney’s support of its LGBTQ employees who objected to the Don’t Say Gay Bill put the company squarely in the GOP governor’s cross hairs. As a result, DeSantis rushed through a bill to dissolve the 55-year-old Reedy Creek Improvement District, authorized by the state legislature in 1967, allowing Disney to provide fire fighting and other public services on Disney’s 40 square miles of property in central Florida.

Government leaders in a number of central Florida counties now fear the state has left them exposed and liable to pay for services to Disney facilities previously paid for and provided by Reedy Creek. DeSantis has sought to calm their fears, however, recently telling a delegation of county officials, “I have no doubt the state’s takeover of Disney World and all its services will be the highlight of my term in office.” A Rueters/Ipsos poll, however, indicates a growing majority of Florida voters are now thinking it should be DeSantis’s only term.

A New Sheriff in Town: Twitter’s Next Owner Already Making Noises about Changes on the Way

SAN FRANCISCO (Rueters) – Elon Musk, the world’s richest man who’s likely to become owner of the planet’s most dangerous misinformation tool, said he has plans for changes he wants implemented at Twitter. Top of mind, according to the guy worth $264 billion, is reducing wages for the company’s 7,000 employees. Next is a new name designed to more accurately depict the company’s mission statement and majority of users.

Musk told banks that agreed to help fund his $44 billion acquisition of Twitter Inc (TWTR.N) that he could crack down on executive and board pay at the social media company in a push to slash costs, and would develop new ways to monetize tweets, three people familiar with the matter said.

The Tesla chief executive also told the banks he will seek moderation policies on the social media platform that are as free as possible within the legal constraints of each jurisdiction Twitter operates, the sources said, a position that he has repeated publicly.

While conservatives have hailed the coming of the so-called “free speech absolutist,” liberals fear a return to Twitter’s bad old days, they said, when bullying, racist comments and threats of and support for violence against users were permitted.

Will this Twit make a comeback?

Specifically, many users are fearful the new owner will drop Twitter’s lifetime ban on former President Donald Trump who’s not having much luck communicating to his tens and tens of subscribers on Truth Social. While Trump has no plans to return to Twitter, he said, Musk isn’t saying if the door will reopen for the Orange Menace.

In his efforts to streamline processes and operations at the social media giant, Musk has said he will move to abbreviate the company’s name, as well, to Twit.

“You can tell a lot about a company and its customers by its name,” Musk said. “Doesn’t Twit say it all?”

Newsmakerblog Adds New Class of Celebs to Reputation in Pieces (RIP) Club; Some You’ll Know Right Away, Some Who May Surprise You

WASHINGTON, DC (Rueters) – Newsmakerblog’s recently launched Reputation in Pieces (RIP) Club has quickly expanded in membership with the announcement of a Second Class following introduction of the Inaugural Class just last month.

One-time actor and nutter Johnny Depp is suing his former wife, one-time model Amber Heard, in a Virginia courtroom for defamation stemming from a Washington Post article she wrote in which identified herself as a victim of domestic abuse. These two seem mutually offputting.

Former actor Johnny Depp testifies about his miserable life. (Rueters photo)

Other new members include: Alec Baldwin of the movie “Rust” fame; Cuba Gooding Jr. for pleading guilty to a reduced charge of forcible touching; Greg Norman, former No. 1 golfer, continues his business dealings with the Saudis despite their horrid human rights record (but business is business, right Greg?); Jussie Smollett for faking a hate crime; Elizabeth Holmes for her fraud conviction for faking blood analysis technology; Aung San Suu Kyi for her descent from Nobel Peace Prize laureate to apologist for Myanmar’s Rohingya genocide while she held national office (and now she may be guilty of corruption); Kevin McCarthy for his shameless pivot in Trump’s culpability for the Jan 6 insurrection and lying about it later (per released audio tapes).

Ex-con Mike Tyson getting to know the passenger sitting behind him on Jet Blue flight to Florida with a series of right jabs. (Photo courtesy TMZ)

Then there’s our favorite new RIP Club member, Mike Tyson, who beat the shit out of some drunk who kept annoying the former world heavyweight champ on a recent Jet Blue flight from San Francisco to Florida.

One Comment

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  1. See this story about the Depp trial? Alpacas brought to court to raise Depp’s spirits!

    Not to be confused with the rise of llamas as therapy animals!

    Squibley and Bushwhacker may want to look into this! Are llamas and alpacas interchangeable??

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